Confidence
and insecurities.
here's two common scenarios:
number one;
i feel horrible because i don't exercise & yet i still eat alot. thus, i complain about being "fat". deep inside, i know the flabs are there. but people... people always assure me that i'm not fat at all. some say i'm out of my mind; or if i was any thinner, i would be anorexic. but you see, you don't understand. the assurances don't work. i'm still as convinced that i'm "fat". i only keep quiet because weight is such a touchy issue among girls. you don't see the fats, would you know? but friends, as normal good friends would do, they often try to convince you otherwise. they'll try to pump a little confidence into you, but the thing is that this doesn't work.
or maybe, maybe it's just the easy way out. it's convenient isn't it? to brush away a person's insecurities with just a statement "no you are not fat. trust me." i'm starting to believe it is so, though this truth is quite hard to take in.
number two;a friend, make that a slim friend, tells me she is fat. my natural reaction would be to jump up and say "no silly, of course you are not."
but guilty as charged,
i don't understand too.
because no matter how i reassure her,
she'll still feel the same.
you see the whole thing now?
it's all about perception.
or rather, warped perception.
if insecurities were that easy to handle,
maybe then, we should call it "a want for attention and compliments" instead.
if just telling the person "you're a babe. you ain't fat. you look awesome!" would help,
perhaps that person wasn't that insecure to start with.
perhaps all that person wanted was attention, and to hear people sing her praises.
feels good ain't it?
but the truth is, people confuse such people with those who have real insecurities.
those with real insecurities won't be convinced no matter what you say.
it won't be easy.
you gotta go a step further, really take time to understand, and try to help.
however sadly, few people do that.
i'm guilty as charged too.
but i will try to change this from today onwards. =)
and darling HH, it hurts me so when i see you self-bash. you were the one who told me not to, so you must try not to do that too ok? you are a great friend, you know that ? :) love you lah.what can i say to make you feel the same way?
hell it's hard to walk away
pretending i don't care.
but i'll get through today, like i did yesterday. (:
